Time VS Regrets.

When is the last time you miss someone that was close to you? Do you feel this sour feeling that makes you feel sad? Makes you feel like you could have done so much more? Makes you feel like there is much you know about that person? Well, what you feel would most likely be one of regrets.

And for me, I happened to keep reminding myself not to regret and always cherish those around me and not take them for granted; or at least I am trying to. Guessed everyone needs a little reminder now and then that life is precious. One moment, those you care for may be fine, but you will never know what would happen to them the next moment. But that's not my main point. My point is whether will you have that regret inside of you, crying so loudly deep within you, but it is just too late to do anything. Don't you find it so true? We all are guilty of that, right?

Tammy reminded me that life is so fragile. Imagine the one you love just happen to pass away unexpectedly; and the only thing left is memories, be it good or bad, happy or sad, what is done was done, and you cannot turn back time, can you? For me, I lost quite a lot of my loves ones, either by death or by circumstances. Do I have regrets? Of course, too much!

For me one of my biggest regret is my mother. I don't really remember her face. Can you believe it? I CAN'T REMEMBER EVEN HER FACE, let alone the small details about her. Come to think of it, I don't even have any photo of her with me, I am such a failure, am I? Since young, she have never really treated me well, that was what I thought because everything she did unto me was quite insignificant then hence bad. But looking back now, everything seems so significant, all she was teaching me was to be able to take care of myself when she is not around, which apparently is so real to me right now. This is also why I love photography. Because it captures moments that time wouldn't allow, just like magic, it is there yet not there. Even though that person may be gone, but at least those moments you spend with him or her is protected in the photo, a picture speaks a thousand words. But this kind of circumstantial regrets is far beyond my control...I may end up just regretting...

I really wished I time would not die on me. Just give me a chance to create at least good memories with her, at least. Having regrets is really a torture, it feels so heavy, so burdened, so depressing. No matter how much I try to forget, somehow or rather I will still remember, besides, I am her son right? Which mother wouldn't want the best for her son? Although I hate her, I choose to believe that she did the best for me.

Dear God, please watch over her for me, bless her. This would let me feel less burden..